"You Either Live Together or You Die Alone"

The next step in recovery happened yesterday when my caretaker, Adriane, headed back to Manitoba. She was a wonderful help during the day to day like helping prepare the food and doing some light housework. I would try to help sometimes, and she got angry at me. She was insistent that I was supposed to rest and recover. My schedule was shaped by hers because she was still working remotely for her job.

I think the obvious deficit of her being gone is not the chores and aid she gave me, as helpful as those were! I can handle all those things. The thing I'm going to miss is the presence of someone who cares.

Whether it was going for my mandatory walks, or watching both seasons of the After Party, almost all of the Righteous Gemstones, or just passing the time talking about a range of things, the truth is, it's friends and people that care about you that make hard situations tolerable.

I've been posting a lot of dumb videos over the course of this and that has been fun, but it's only fun when there's people to share them with.

Before the surgery, it was harder to be by myself and walk around freely than it was for tubes coming out of my chest, neck, and urethra but having people there to be at my side or visiting.

I get that we shouldn't be looking to others for validation or trying to people please or be codependent or enmeshed with others, but what makes life good is sharing life with others.

I think that's one of the big takeaways of this whole situation for me. It's something I've believed for a long time and highlighted by one of my favorite stories, Lost. That show's mantra was "Either we live together or we die alone." Everything good that has come from humanity was because we were there for each other.

So, I suppose that means for me, that it will be important that I try to arrange times to see more friends throughout the rest of this recovery especially now that Adriane has gone.

Thank you, again, Adriane. I am so fortunate to have a friend like you during a time like this.

The Home is Where the Heart Is Now That It Has Left the Hospital

 I was sent home on Monday straight from the ICU, which is a rare feat! That whole day was a lot. I had to meet with a series of specialists to sign off on discharging me. I had to go to a class to give an overview on what to expect, to do, and to avoid for when I return home. We got home, got more prescriptions filled, started the new routines of checking blood pressure, weighing myself, a daily shower to specifically clean the incision.

It was a long day and I could feel the limit of my energy and capability.

This is my third full day at home now and I'm slipping into a routine. The purpose of the next six weeks is to safely build my endurance without straining my healing body. I'm supposed to go on two walks a day each a minute longer than the walks from the day previous. Eventually, it is supposed to be that I can go for a sixty-minute walk with no breaks by the time I get to cardio rehab in mid-December. At that point, they will be then pushing me to build strength and endurance so I will be able to return to my pre-operation capabilities.

At the moment, I feel good for the most part. I have energy to last the day and the pain is minimal and only managed by Tylenol. I am eating with my usual appetite. I feel pretty good because my caretaker Adriane is usually nearby and I've been visited by a friend every day or two. I think that aspect alone has been huge. I liven up when I get to catch up with people.

My range of motion in my arms and legs is much better than I thought it would be and that has been nice to not worry about how I move. I have to be careful with how I move my right arm a little bit, but otherwise, I am pretty capable.

Like the last post talked about, sleep is my biggest challenge. I've been trying to figure out what is the best way to be comfortable, but usually every hour, a streak of pain goes across my back and will force me to move and tend to it. I don't think I've gotten much sleep and whatever I have had is on that first level of light sleep. Fortunately, my energy levels are such that I can still enjoy the daytime and not feel groggy and out of it.

The other smaller challenge is that I am restricted in how much liquid I am allowed to drink each day. Only a 1.5L per day. That is not a lot. Especially for me who normally drinks a lot of milk, juice, and water and less food in general. I have to portion out my small cup of liquid every 3 hours and I DO NOT LIKE!

I have a doctor's appointment next week to take out the last suture from where the chest tube went into my chest (guh!) and then it seems like the next major milestone will be the cardio rehab in six weeks.

Food has been coming in and it has been great! We are making our way through it and are set up for this first stretch. There are gaps in the sheet if you want to send me some food, too. Food for Dave Post Surgery Signup Sheet - Google Sheets

I am still keeping up the GoFundMe. As I have said before I will be okay, but there are always unexpected expenses and if people want to help that way, I won't turn it down: https://gofund.me/c91bd8dfd

Anyway, that is the update for now, thank you all for the kind words of support as well as the pragmatic gifts of support. It all helps. Thank you.

Sitting in the ICU

 Here we are.

I am in the ICU, I have a single room that overlooks the city and it's going great.

I don't think I could be recovering better than I have been. The nurses have been commenting how strong my body is (that is not a common description for me) and how well I've been doing. I think they are used to more 80 years old come through here and less 42 year olds who have an physically active job. Regardless, every day, they remove more and more things from me. I am "ward-ready" as they say, so they are just waiting for a bed to open up for me there. It may not happen until tomorrow. Funny enough, it's not impossible for me to skip the ward entirely and leave as early as tomorrow.

There have not really been any curveballs thrown my way in recovery. I am able to walk around without help for short distances. The pain in my chest feels minimal. I haven't been in extreme pain that much.

I have to give a lot of credit to Adriane, who has been at my bedside throughout the days here. She is sharp and paying attention to all the details that nurses have been talking about as well as helping me sort out what the best course of action is and noticing what has worked for me and such. She's been an excellent advocate.

Sleep is probably the number one challenge, but I knew it would be for me. I sleep on my stomach normally, but now I have to sleep up my back. I have may be gotten a handful of hours of sleep each day. But I'm handling it as best as I can.

I know in my last post, there was a lot of darkness in there and that may be something that creeps back later, but right now, recovery is the distraction for me. And hopefully, once I'm recovered physically, I'll be better able to sort through that mental challenge.

Things I need at this point are for people to come visit and for people to sign up for meal drop offs. Food for Dave Post Surgery Signup Sheet - Google Sheets

I'll update again when there's another major beat to cover, but that's it for now.