What Reality Does is Steal the Laughter From Children

This is my 24th birthday today. How am I celebrating it? With food. A lot of food. My roommate, Aaron, just took me out for breakfast. Darwin's taking my out for lunch and I am holding a potluck at my house tonight. So much food.

I'm also learning how to cook. I mean it actually putting together meals that require a stove and do not come with the label Campbell's or Chef Boyardee. Last night I made my first recipe-directed meal, which was a Dill Pork Stir Fry. And I have to say that it was awesome. I fooled people into believing I have more skill than I do. That's what my acting career depends on.

People are always telling you to not put on masks and that is a bunch of phooey. Masks prevent people from knowing that you are disappointingly human. Instead you create an illusion. And who doesn't like magic tricks? Mennonites and Baptists. But they don't count and it hinders my point. Magic tricks are fun and entertaining. Sure, they are based on a thick coat of deception and lies, but that is what people want. They want to be fooled by a false persona. They don't want to know the real person, because a real person brings along such nuisances such as real life problems. And real life problems require real concern and who wants that? I mean why should I help you when I'm having enough trouble maintaining my illusionary mask? That mask takes a lot of time and effort to maintain. Maintaining a mask requires as much time and effort as it does to face reality. The difference is that a mask hides the hassle that is emotion and facing reality requires facing reality. Oh and there's no fun magic-like illusions in reality either. You see what reality does is steal the laughter from children and that's why we avoid it.

So I will continue to fool people into believing that I can cook and act and drive without a license until the point when someone gets poisoned or run over and then I will have to create another illusion and flee to Mexico. You solve discovered lies by creating new, more elaborate ones. It's worked for 24 years, maybe it will work for another 24. Although hopefully for longer than that. I want to be older than 48 so that I can complain about how you can't trust the youths these days.