I Probably Should Pack Up Instead of Write This

Friday night's show went fairly well. We upped it a notch with lighting and giving me a mike. It was close to looking professional. Maybe it still wasn't quite there, but for me it was some big steps forward. When I looked out into the audience, all I saw were the bright lights and the silhouettes of people's heads. I realized I really haven't done a traditional style of theatre in a long time. It has usually been the simple "get-up-on-stage-and-do-something" kind of approach.

Anyway, it was good time and there was a positive reaction, however, I am a poor judge of the reaction, because even if they didn't like it, they would never say it to your face so any reaction would be under suspect. That said, when I was talking with people, they did mention parts that they really liked which is a more positive sign.


Here was the stand out favourite of the crowd that night. Sam Peterson was one of the highlights for me in this one.

Regardless, I was, like after I finished the last two shows, kind of sad when it was done. You put a lot of work into a show and then in an hour and a half, it's done. I was took a walk after the show to go get some food. I don't usually eat a whole lot on the day of a big performance and afterwards I did not want to make anything. So I went and got fast food. You know. Nutrition. As I was walking down the street, still wearing my suit and heavy coat, reflecting on the show and had that kind of lost feeling in the sense that I was so preoccupied for the last several weeks and now I have nothing to do. That's changing really soon, but there's nothing for me to prepare for and so I am in this strange eye of the storm.

Creative work takes up a lot of time unlike a retail or 9 to 5 type jobs. Sure, they're not usually physically draining or strenuous but they are consuming in a different way. Most of your time is centered around your craft. Some jobs get to leave their work at their workplace, but for me, the show is always lingering at the back of your mind. I know it must of been at least a little annoying for the guys at the Life Together house (along with other random friends) to have to hear about the ideas I had for sketches and videos, but that was what going on in my head. I had to. I am not able to just go and sit and hammer out ideas for a block of time and once the time was done, stop thinking about it.


Now, that the show is done, I was left on Saturday with nothing to do. I suppose I should've started packing up or some such nonsense like that, but I was looking for someone to hang out with because it seems I haven't done a whole lot of that in the light of the fact that I was prepping the show. The funny thing is that I was unsure of who to call. I think I wanted to hang out with someone that I can be comfortable around, just relax with, talk about things that matter, someone whom I would miss. However, most of those people either were busy or whom I assumed was busy. In the end, I spent the night just on my own and walked down to Osbourne. It was sort of nice, but kind of disappointing. So I did the only thing I knew how to do and started working on a new show. It wasn't exactly what I had envisioned for that night.


The thing is, I really can't be too upset about that. That's literally the kind of life I have chosen to live for the next while. One where I am working on shows and scripts. It's kinda like I have decided that the friend I am going to spend more time with is my stage persona than some of these other good friends of mine. In Nelson, I am not sure if I am going to find a lot of friends who are on the same general wavelength as me and my best friend might be my work which I don't know if I'll like a whole lot. We'll see.


As I write this, I have for the first time realized that I don't know a whole lot of people in Nelson. There are some contacts there, but not a lot of long time friends. Not like when I went to Providence or when I moved to the city. The last time I did this, I went to Covenant Bible College and I think the most important thing that happened there was that I got to redefine my life. These experiences may be challenging and perhaps not comfortable, but it may give me the thing I need to push myself forward. Interesting...


"Yeah, runnin' down a dream
That would never come to me
Workin' on a mystery, going wherever it leads
Runnin' down a dream"
- Tom Petty's "Runnin' Down a Dream" from his album "Full Moon Fever"