It's an Inside Job Today

Today was my first day off in the camp stretch of the Summer Ministry Team and it was very much needed. I have been a little sick and a little frustrated. When I drove away from the camp, it was nice to have a chance to breathe and not worry about the next sketch or the next big game. I didn't even prep for what was next. I checked email, Twitter, read my Bible, listened to music, reflect.

I think what made me relax was, strangely enough, an article that Mark Driscoll wrote. Let me say that he is not a usual source for me, but he did say something that struck me. He talked about when big things like someone stealing his car or something hurting his family that he would have a Christian kind of reaction, but it was the common annoyances that he would have an atheistic reaction. His reaction would not be consistent with what he believed. It was a good thought. I've thought about my perspective on the world and holding onto things loosely and the big things in my life don't bother me such as what am I doing in the future because I know I will go where I am needed. The area that slips through is the common annoyances that can add up and even in those situations my patience needs to endure.

It goes with my idea of the heavenmind and the hellmind. I'm sure someone smarter has come up with a similar idea and this can be misconstrued as ripping that person off, but I did not talk to that person. The idea can be easily summed up in the picture of a traffic jam where the heavenminded person sits peacefully and enjoys the opportunity to reflect while the hellminded person is losing it in the next car over. The heavenminded has patience and has the perspective to not get wrapped up in minor things while the hellminded person is so focused on their little kingdoms that when their expectations are not met, it derails them.

I think that's why humans are supposed to have Sabbath or a day in the week to step back, rest and reflect on who they are in relation to God, themselves and the world around them.

Anyway, another great moment was finding a book at a store in Onanole called "Poor Michael's". The book was called "Why Christianity Must Change or Die" by an Episcopal bishop named John Shelby Spong. I flipped through it and read something that made me want to buy the book. So I did. It was a book that he writes to, as he calls them, "believers in exile".

This is what stood out to me:
"I have no interest in a system of rewards and punishments. I do not see the purpose of life after death to be that of motivating behavior in the here and now. I can live without any sense of heaven as a place of reward or hell as a place of punishment... I do assert that one prepares for eternity not by being religious and keeping the rules, but by living fully, loving wastefully, and daring to be all that each of us has the capacity to be. I also assert that making it possible for everyone else to live, to love, and to be is the only mission that Christian people possess. Our task is not to convert; our task is to call people into the depths of their own capacity to be... In that faith I believe that I discover life that is eternal. Is that sufficient to say that Christianity redefined, freed from many of its supernatural claims of the past, but still recognizable, will survive the exile? I think it is. But time alone will conclude whether or not my judgment is correct. I, however, will live my life as if it is."

I think I will find the rest of it to be an interesting read, but this gave me excitement.

As I got back to the camp, I had several conversations all in a row that made this day significant. I talked with the director of the team about the how the team was going and she encouraged my work with the churches, the camps and the team. I talked with a camper about how a major step in maturity is knowing when to ask for help as opposed to expecting others to know when we hurt. I, along with Rob, talked with another camper about how it is important to live with integrity and respond with peace and honesty in the face of those who mock us or lie about us. I had another talk with Bryan, the director of the current camp, about what it means to follow Christ, the grace of God and that life change is not in a moment, but rather requires us to participate in it.

It was very convenient that the day that started me off ragged and frustrated wound up strengthening me and reminding me that this life of faith is bigger than the here and now, but rather through the grace of God, the example of Christ, the refining of the Holy Spirit and our compliance that we will grow into our heroic selves with a heavenmindedness that will call humanity out of the darkness.

"I will not lose my faith
It's an inside job today
I know this one thing well,
I used to try and kill love, it was the highest sin
Breathing insecurity out and in
Searching hope, I'm shown the way to run straight
Pursuing the greater way for all human light
How I choose to feel is how I am
How I choose to feel is how I am
I will not lose my faith
It's an inside job today
Holding on, the light of the night
On my knees to rise and fix my broken soul again.
Let me run into the rain
To be a human light again
Let me run into the rain
To shine a human light again."
- "Inside Job" from Pearl Jam's self-titled album