Tuesday, September 16, 2008

If Facebook Does Not Go Back to the Way It Was I Am Going to Burn This Mother Down

People on Facebook are funny. For some reason there have been a lot of people who are for some reason upset with the new Facebook layout. Everyday I see in my feed a couple of people signing up for groups like "I Hate the New Facebook!" or "The New Layout of Facebook is Making Me Mad! Poo!" or "If Facebook Does Not Go Back to the Way It Was I Am Going to Burn This Mother Down!" That last one is probably the most confusing because why would you burn the building you're in down because of something intangible on the Internet. But then I realized it doesn't need to make sense because these people are upset because of layout. Layout. Not the fact that Facebook has a bunch of your personal information and literally uses it to send targeted advertisements to you. I can see some people getting upset over all the Christian dating site ads and Foo Fighter concert tickets and meeting Christian girls at Foo Fighters concert sites. I can find my own dates thank you very much Internet! Bordering on invasion of privacy is something that I think is something that is ok to get upset over. I mean, just don't sign up. But people who are upset over the layout of your personal information is the problem.

"This website is impossible to navigate now that it's been moderately rearranged how the heck am I supposed to encapsulate my life in a cyberspace bubble on a website if I have to click on a tab every once in a while! Aaargggh!" And then they throw the keyboard across the room and spontaneously transform into their werewolf forms. But don't worry, these werewolves won't literally attack anybody, they spread their virus on Facebook. If you are worried about a social networking site not being conducive to the ultimate experience of your poking, pirate/ninja-battling, chump-biting, anti-new Facebook group joining then you should probably just drop the whole thing and just go and hang out with the people that you use Facebook to avoid actually spend time with. At least pick up a phone and call someone about how you hate the new Facebook and then never use Facebook again. I have this funny suspicion that very few people that have joined these groups actually have vocally expressed their reasons for their hatred of the layout, because if they did do that instead of arbitrarily joining groups and crying about it, then they would actually hear what kind of ludicrous idiocy it is to care about that.


San Gregorio said...

My favorite part was that facebook told me the title was, "If Facebook Does Not Go Back to the Way It Was I Am Going to Burn this Moth"

I thought, Dave, you have finally gotten it. Moths are the problem. After eight years of trying to convince you that these fucking moths are the problem you finally have gotten it. Now we just have to keep moths from controlling the white house.

Anonymous said...

I agree that all of the anti new facebook shit is lame. However when you use the word fuck it just seems real phony to me...