If Faith Covenant Church Could Choose a Modern Day Prophet, It Would Be Rob Bell

At church a couple of weeks ago, the topic was service. What was interesting to me was from a Rob Bell video. It may just be me, but it seems like if Faith Covenant Church could choose a modern day prophet, it would be Rob Bell. Which I would be fine with. Anyway, Rob was talking about how Jesus was going from town to town, preaching and healing and in one town, they wanted Jesus to stay. But Jesus keep heading to Jerusalem. Of course, Jesus could have stayed and done many good things, but that was not what Jesus was there for. Jesus had his sight set on Jerusalem. He had chosen his path and had to say no to the things that would take Him away from that path. In the same way, we can't take up everything that comes our way. We can't because there is too much for us.

Rob goes on to talk about about this idea of Kierkegaard, about willing the one thing. Focusing our energy into the thing we're supposed to be doing. If we are going to say yes to everything, we're not going to be able to do the thing where our strength lies. Of course all of these different things can be good things, but we don't have the capability to do all things. We have to choose wisely.

So the question came up, what should I be focusing on? What should be the thing that I focus on? What has God given me the ability to do? And I simply don't know. I mean I do have a plan of how I can take care of myself financially and everything, but that is not anything special. I mean, my skill set is weird. I can sort of write. I am better than some average schmuck with public speaking. I am funny to a degree. I would like to think that I am very adaptive in my thinking. I would like to think that I am objective in my approach. I should point out that whatever my focus is, the one thing I will, I don't see it as my job. Maybe that's my problem. But whatever my job is or will be, it's just the thing I do for money. It seems like there should be some magnum opus that I am supposed to be working on that I'm not while I wasting my time doing other things that are just in the way.

It's odd, although I believe that I am handling work well and that in some ways things are right, it feels like the whole ship is following the wrong current, and I am unsettled. It's like I'm meant to be a wanderer but I'm too busying setting up shop and trying to be responsible. I'm torn between some unknown dream that I can't grasp and a life of duty and hard work because there's no safety net. If I try to 'go find myself' and not find me, I am going to pooch myself doubly. Yet if I let myself get older, I may discover myself too late to be what I am supposed to be.

Unsettled is basically the summary of this post. But we'll all float on ok, we'll all float on alright.